I had a great learning night last night... and a great milestone this morning.
Food - its still a struggle for me visually - the want vs need vs able to eat.
Last night we were watching some tv (Kitchen Nightmares...which really shouldn't stimulate the appetite) and Gordon was at a seaside restaurant and made fish and chips. The old evil beast reared its head - I WANT - so instead of home "cooked" soup with a little bit of cheese and crackers for dinner, we decided to go to the pub and get some traditional fish and chips. That was mistake one.
Mistake two was ordering an appy and a plate of fish and chips to share. Which, in past would have been a major victory. However, now it is still TOO MUCH.
We had veggie samosas to start. I had one, took most of the dough off, and ate the inside. We shared the fish and chips, I ate most of the piece of fish - took off 90% of the batter and had 1.5T of tartar sauce. It was served with green peas, and chips. I had 4 chips, and 3T of peas.
Once again, there is good progress here, I'm making better choices, but I'm still not seeing the portions - when I'm eating out. I'm doing good with my portions at home - smaller plates, measuring tools etc.
That my friends, is WAY too much food. It was like once I had eaten the samosa I forgot that I had. It's all part of the process, and tonight, Gandalf the Sleeve did his job.
I felt terrible and when I got home, it all came back up. Not how I want to manage my food, but it's excellent negative reinforcement. I wanted fish and chips, but I wanted it like I had it before. That just isn't possible anymore. I can't eat like that, if I try, I don't enjoy it.
I talked to the Husbeast about it after. I was the instigator, I wanted bad food, food that I won't enjoy and food that is not going to get me to where I want to be. I told him that I need him to be a sounding board. He is such a great man, he only wants to make me happy. A great quality to have in a husband, but not great for a food-partner-in-crime. We are taking steps to stop this kind of bad behavior.
This mornings weigh in was a major milestone for me. 259.8lbs
I have finally touched the 250's. TWO FRAKING FIFTYS! The last time I was in the 250's was in 2007. It's such a great feeling to see that number.