December Recap

December has come and gone in a flash! 

I've had some great moments in December.   I hit my goal of 40lbs lost and I lost a total of 5lbs this month.  Not my best effort, there was a lot of snacking on Christmasy type treats and sweets.

December by the Numbers:

Nov 30 - 265.2 Dec 1 - 264.6
Dec 2 - 263.8
Dec 3 - 264.6
Dec 4 - 265.2
Dec 5 - 264.6
Dec 6 - 264
Dec 7 - 264
Dec 8 - 264
Dec 9 - 263.8
Dec 10 - 263.4
Dec 11 - 262.4
Dec 12 - 262
Dec 13 - 260.6 (-40lbs)
Dec 17 - 261.2
Dec 18 - 260.6
Dec 19 - 260.4
Dec 20 - 260.8
Dec 21 - 261.8
Dec 22 - 260.4
Dec 23 - 260.2
Dec 24 - 259.8
Dec 25 - 259.8
Dec 26 - 260.0
Dec 27 - 260.0
Dec 28 - 259.8
Dec 29 - 260.6
Dec 30 - 259.2
Dec 31 - 260.2

Total lost in December: 5lbs
Total lost: 40.8lbs

This month has had a LOT of up and down, and not much in the way of down in the second half of the month.  I'm trying to not worry about it too much, because there is a lot of great stuff that happened as well as the holidays.  

Yesterday I had a tough moment that I've been stewing on.  One of the few people that I've told about my surgery made a pointed comment. I think she is trying to encourage and be supportive, but its really hit me in the guts.

I told her that I had lost 5-6lbs this month, to which she replied,  "that's not enough, I lost that with just exercise this month".

Ouch.

I think it hurts because its mostly true.  This month is not great. I can try harder: I have not been tracking food, I have been sitting around, I have not been getting enough water... I need to change those things.  But I'm also struggling with being HAPPY about 5lbs.  I mean. I would have been lucky to have gained ONLY 5 over Christmas before.  So I don't know, ug. This is not how I wanted to close out the year.

5lbs is 1.25lbs a week - I would like to think that is pretty stellar progress - slow, steady, nothing too crazy.  However, 2013 I do HAVE TO start back biking, my morning exercise is needed, for many reason!  Fitness, mental health and physical condition.

Sunday Relax

Weigh-in this morning: 260.2

Breakfast... buckwheat vanilla banana pancakes! 
1c buckwheat pancake mix
3 eggs
4oz Big Train Vanilla protein powder
2 small bananas mashed
2/3c water

Made 6, I had 1.5.

Coffee & eggnog.  Not much more Christmassy then eggnog in my morning coffee. 

YUM! 

The dog has been washed, the pancakes have been eaten. A girlfriend and I are going to get an hour of reflexology this afternoon.  All my shopping is done.  Laundry is mostly caught up.  Kitchen is a mess, but such is life! 

Christmas is mostly here, we were hoping that the Husbeast was going to be strong enough to come up to the second level for Christmas day, so we could sit on the sofa together for the first time in 7 months, but that many stairs are still too many for him.  Ah well - he will get there eventually.

He had bi-lateral quad tendon rupture/repair this summer, so stairs are one of the last things that come.  Ah well, we will just carry on as we have - dinners, movies in his bedroom on the ground floor.  I'll bring all his gifts down to him on Christmas morning.  This has made wrapping and hiding his Christmas stuff MUCH easier since he can't see what I have on the kitchen table!! haha

He has to work Monday, so I need to line up some nice things for me to do... bath, dog walk in the park, netflix, reading. We are having a friend over on Monday night, so I need do some cleaning.  It can wait for tomorrow though.  Today, I'm just going to enjoy the rest of it as I see fit.

Thankful

Today is a trigger day for me, and so, the day before thanksgiving I'm going to give you my "thankful" post.

Today I'm suffering through some of my binge eating triggers. Pain, frustration, stress, tired, grocery shopping and the worst part...time in my car. AKA: the food chariot. The ugly scene of many a food crime that I have committed against myself for years.

I "WANT" candy, chocolate, ice cream, crackers, sweets, pie, whipped cream..... You name it. I want it in my mouth.

But today, I have been saved from myself. The sleeve will not allow me to get out of control. It was both exhilarating and irritating.

The old ugly binge beast has reared it's head and it demands to be fed. I was going to give in, i was going to sit in my car and eat cookies and chocolate. but my surgery is helping me. Today my sleeve is Gandolf, "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!"

Picture is my binge: cottage cheese, hard boiled eggs, roasted chicken, red & green peppers. (unpictured: handful of nuts). Ate half. :)

Short Weeks!

We are off from work this week on Thursday and Friday! HURRAY!

My only real disappointment is that I'm on rest for my back. No Pushing, pulling or lifting. Which means I won't get in my biking or weights this week.  Damn. 

We are having an orphans, widows and outcasts Thanksgiving with friends on Thursday. It should be super fun.   I'm excited, it will be my first big food outing with people that don't know I've had surgery, so eating slowly and talking lots (shouldn't be a problem), will get me through.

Friday the Husbeast has to work, so I'm going to have a crafty day with a friend. Get some xmas decorating done, and some little sewing projects.

I'm heading up to the Great White North in early December to see a girlfriend that I've not visited in almost 2 years. Her kids are getting to big, I have to go and see them all before they are magically teens!  This also means that I have to get my sh!t together so that once I'm up there I can send the rest of the family their Christmas gifts. WAY better then paying to mail them across the border.

I'm going to put on my thinking cap for this one.

Weigh in this morning was excellent: 268.4

Its been a LONG time since I've seen that number. LONG TIME.  Like, I can't remember time. 

I'm heading downwards, and making good choices.  I had a little trouble with dinner last night. Brown rice spicy salmon sushi.   I think it was the rice.  So next time I'll take it slower, and do a couple of checks on if I should eat more or not.

Also.... WATER WATER WATER

Tonights indulgence.... The Walking Dead. Missed it Sunday, tonight I get to see what is going on!!!