242.8

I haven't seen 242 in about 4 months :)

Feeling: happy and determined.

July Recap 2015

Not much happened in July except more of the same bs. 

 

Me complaining about weight gain, job shit etc. 

Aug 1 I decided to get my poop in a scoop and stop effing about. 

Back on food diary

Protein is king

Carbs last

More water

In what has been on of the most stressful weeks of my life this last year... I managed to lose 5 lbs, write two finals, learn my new job and work full time on my old job, and manage the last week of work with the woman at work that has been basically bullying me. (She is a contractor that was terminated (not for the reason I wanted, but still a win)).

Anyway, stopping the self denial and crappy attitude has demo straightens that I'm NOT faulty. I an NOT broken

I CAN lose weight when I do the right stuff. 

Boom. Truth hurts. My attitude is the problem. 

Wish

Ug... Those famous words....

Wish in one hand, piss in the other. See which one fills up first. 

I wish...

That I hated food and only ate because I needed to. 

That I didn't think about food all the time.

That there was something else in my life that made me feel as good as eating. 

June Recap 2015

245.8

Job bullshit came to a head this last week. 

My new boss was demoted, and I've been wondering what will happen to me. 

This morning I was offered a new position in another department, which I think will suit me a lot better. Phew!

Been trying to get more water in, middling success. 

Exercise is getting better, squats are going up in weight and I'm starting to feel strong again. 

Food.... Still snacking when I'm not hungry, but I'm slowly reigning it in. 

Wrote my midterms, passed. 

Just pounding away at my courses and pushing through. 

Oh look

What two days of drinking water more frequently and eating slightly more responsibly can do. 

When will I learn to keep at this ALL the time? 

Feeling more positive. 

May Recap 2015

Argggggggg. 246.2

Man, I'm really sucking ballz at:

Water - less than 2L a day typically

Sleep - less than 6 hrs a night

Snacking - greater than 3 extra snacks a day 

Meals - greater amounts than I need to eat. 

Gawds. I keep saying the same thing. 

Do better

Do better

Do better

I keep not doing it. 

I'm in a funk. I hate my job. I can't sleep. I'm in school full time at night. I only want to eat carbs and cry all the time.